If your life…

If your life would fit in a suitcase, how big would it be?

My life would fit in something like this.

life in a suitcase

It would hold all of my precious possessions – some of my all-time favorite albums, copies of my books which I could reread until the end of time, pictures of family and friends, my favorite t-shirt, a pair of Chucks, my handy dandy netbook, my journal, my headset, a hair clip, a headband, a scrunchie, all of my savings in Mr. Cow, a whole month supply of coffee, charcoal pencil, and my sketchpad.

cash cow. literally.

Now, where would I go?

Probably in Cubao. Get on a bus and head up north.

Childhood memories

Some pictures I found in a dusty album.

the makings of a good driver.

I don’t remember much about the day when this picture was taken, but I’m sure I enjoyed “driving around”. (Ignore my facial expression; I look like that in most of my pictures).

with my mom at my sister's birthday party.

This picture was supposed to include only myself in the frame. But I think it looks better. See how pretty my Mom is.

flower girl.

This was the first and last time someone asked me to be their flower girl. Funny thing was the ring bearer (my cousin) had chicken pox during the wedding. I had to walk a little slower so I can have ample distance from him. Haha!

RIP J.D. Salinger

J. D. Salinger

Today, the great J.D. Salinger passed away. His book, Catcher in the Rye, made me realize that not everyone needs saving.

Little

The light is almost fatal. That was the first thing that came to my mind after being born into the world – with both my arms and legs intact. I tried to cut loose from the cord that’s holding me back. I tugged harder and harder, but still this huge mass would not simply let me be. I ran out of brilliant ideas to free myself from such weight.

with my mom at my sister's birthday party.

Toy Hunt

baby doll.

One boring afternoon, I decided to check out the room upstairs where we keep all the old stuff — everything from kitchenware to toys. Here are some of the interesting toys I found.

smile.

This is one of the dolls my cousin used to play with. I liked the strawberry prints on her dress.

Lego.

Lego creation.

This was my brother’s last Lego creation. I don’t how long it has been since we last played. Back in the day, we would compete by trying to build the biggest house (with two-car garage and Olympic-sized swimming pool) or coolest contraption.

exploring nature

This wasn’t ours. I think this was my cousin’s, but it sure caught my eye. I wonder how they played with this one.

The Kong

Act like the Kong when you lose me. Ruin a city just to find me.

I live for art.

I have always been sure that I was born to create. I am a maker in this lifetime. Everything from stories to paper mache has become my object of attention. Details matter in my vibrant world.

I never outgrew the phase of coloring books and story books.

child-like.

At the age of nine, I got into art summer classes in my Mom’s office. I learned charcoal, oil on canvas, pastel, and tie-dye. It was an amazing experience to use common things like straws and strings to come up with something abstract.

I have always been sure that I was born to create. I am a maker in this lifetime. Everything from stories to paper mache has become my object of attention. Details matter in my vibrant world.

random stranger

pencil (2008)

Thursday’s Time Capsule says: Yesterday was a random day. So.

Yesterday, I went to this interview. (Backgrounder: I just resigned last December to study full time for the Marketing Comm degree I hope to earn by 2011 *fingers crossed*) During the interview, I met the directors for this IT school in Makati. (They have an interesting program for new media design, I must say).

The interview went well. The directors were pretty cool about me talking about myself for almost an hour. (I wanted to leave already because I had met a new friend just outside the boardroom).

Flashback: Elevator scene. We were at the L/G and the directors’ office was on the 6th.

Random Person (RP) while looking at me: So, you’re also applying for the position (bleeep) These aren’t her exact words, but they gave something to that effect. Pardon my poor memory; I easily forget the parts where I felt I was boring her.

Me while looking at the clock, while waiting for the elevator to come, while waiting for an interesting topic to talk about: Ah yes, I am. And I suppose you’re also applying.

The conversation moved on to the basics — age, course finished during college, present job etc.

THEN, WHAM! The universe worked its way around this supposedly too easy to forget moment.

Conversation included books, music, dreams, aspirations, and weird stuff all put together in epic portions.

After the interview, we decided to drop by Powerbooks and exchanged recommendations.

She likes sci-fi

(specifically George R.R. Martin)

Remind me to get a copy of A Game of Thrones

We ate at Jipan, talked about our previous jobs, future plans, and listened to each other’s music (her list had some 90s music and a lot of songs she dances to; mine had Vampire Weekend’s Contra, Natalie Walker’s Urban Angel, and Full House’ OST)

Cool headphones, I forgot to tell her.

Oh well, there’s a next time. Most definitely.

Soliloquy

13 July 2005

The security has been breached. Desperate times call for desperate measures. Well, not so desperate yet. I have this feeling that some small things haven’t really changed. I mean, they’re not gone. They’re still there. Here.

And I know I’ve moved on, grown wiser and better. I am not about to make the same mistake all over again. I know this. I must always remember to know my place and stand there. Stay in my place. Impulses take me nowhere so I must fight them back.

What’s really hard not to do is to acknowledge that possibility of being with him and probably being happy. Things would go well. This is the real supposedly “second chance” at everything. I am not going to mess things up. I am not.

i am ticking.

Time really did go by. I felt it. And I see this now more than ever. I have changed. My feelings changed. I refuse to be selfish. I now think bigger than myself. I think of the other person. I think of you.

I refuse to fill my head with thoughts of uncertainties and “could have been’s”. I shall of now. It’s the one that’s within my control. I can change because I have changed and I certainly can do it again.

Carousel

ink, pastel (2008)

Buckets of sunshine seep into orange-colored days

Lying down, all day long

Under the fabric of wind-swept clouds

Trees spinning, time deceiving

The outline of your face

Belongs to me

Every curve, stealing

Every breath

Silence pulls me to stay

You begin to hum our song

Salty tears sting the air

The music died

Just as the pony left the ground.